


Dead Snow

by FearTheSpork



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: F/M, I have been given life, New episodes of Lucifer are the shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-05-04
Packaged: 2018-10-28 02:43:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10822074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FearTheSpork/pseuds/FearTheSpork
Summary: Lucifer loves his Detective. He just had a roundabout way of telling her so.





	Dead Snow

**Author's Note:**

> It's super short because I just wanted an excuse to practice a little humour and some dialogue while I was at it. It's barely even a story.

"Damn it!" Chloe slammed her hands against the dashboard of the useless car, breath fogging in front of her in the wake of the uttered swear word. She slammed her phone down and threw herself back in her seat, arms crossed and anger simmering dangerously just under the surface.

"I take it it wasn't _good_ news then?"

From the passenger seat, Lucifer eyed her warily in obvious concern. As gorgeous as she was when she was angry- close confines usually meant that he was going to be in the firing line if he said something wrong.

Although right now, there was a good chance that simply _breathing_ might be wrong. But the Devil liked to play with fire and she was glorious when she burned so hot.

Chloe turned to face him, inwardly counting to ten so she didn't murder him.

"They won't be here. Until. The. Morning," she growled and Lucifer shifted a little further away from her for fear of losing a limb. "Stupid, useless piece of crap!" she kicked the underside of the dashboard- hard- and the little rental car shuddered around them.

A testament to just how cheap the L.A.P.D were when it came to sparing expenses. They'd been incredibly unimpressed to arrive in New York in the middle of a blizzard and even less impressed when they'd seen the car that her department had organised for them to drive around in.

Lucifer was pretty sure that he owned food mixers with more staying power than whatever 'just-out-of-the-toy-factory' car they'd been landed with.

Then to top it all off they'd been told that the witness they'd been there to escort back to California had left police protection that morning and was currently holed up in their farmhouse outside the city.

The farmhouse that was at least six miles in front of the snowbank they were currently half buried in.

"You know that really isn't good for the car. Any sharp bangs from inside and the wheels might fall off," he observed drily, before shrinking back against the door when she turned her glare in his direction with an _'are you serious_?' look. "Right yes, this is clearly no time for jokes," he gave a tight smile before looking away and yeah, she should have felt guilty for the dirty look but...

Like he'd said, now really wasn't the time. Stuck in the middle of a snowstorm with a frozen car and your sort of maybe boyfriend trying and failing to lighten the mood?

Oh the wondrous joys of working for the L.A.P.D.

A few moments of silent thought passed before Chloe started to feel a little guilty. She hadn't meant to take it out on him and she knew he was only trying to make her feel better but did he have do it in a way that made her even angrier?

But still, at least he'd been trying. In all fairness, he was the only thing that had made the whole trip bearable so far. He'd put them up in a nice hotel with his own money, bought her dinner the night before from the restaurant she'd wanted to try down the street. He'd been unrelentingly sweet to her and now she felt like an asshole.

So she made the effort to try and start a conversation with, "All we need now are some vampires and we could have a pretty decent movie."

It took a moment, but eventually the corner of his mouth quirked upwards and she silently rejoiced in the fact that he could never stay mad at her for long. Or resist the urge to wax lyrical and show off his knowledge about films.

"Or some Nazi zombies."

Semi- argument forgotten already, Chloe snorted in a very unladylike way and it made his smile widen. "Dead Snow, Lucifer? Really?"

He simply shrugged as if saying, 'if you get the reference then you've seen it too. You can't say anything'.

Fair point.

"When we get home we're going to have a serious discussion about your terrible taste in movies. If we don't freeze to death first," she added, casting a glance out of the front window at the sea of white pummelling the car. As an afterthought, she said, "I might even get you to sit your ass down and watch Frozen at long last. Trixie's dying to watch it with you."

Lucifer looked as far from overjoyed as a person could.

"Can I cast my vote now in favour of freezing to death?"

"Mmm," she shrugged her shoulders and made a sarcastic face at him. "Who doesn't just love a guy who'd rather die in an icy wasteland than spend time with your child? Definitely a keeper."

"Ooh, somebody is definitely a little touchy," he grouched, crossing his arms in some pointless attempt to conserve body heat. He was the Devil. He burned hotter than any human and yet here he was, about to freeze his balls off in a broken down car. He'd bet every penny he had that his Father was up in Heaven laughing his arse off at him. "I've told you countless times before that I'm not a child person. When your offspring grows up I'm sure we'll get along famously. Until then, I'll get by with the occasional pat on the head."

"You're assuming you'll still be around when Trixie is older?" Chloe sat back in her seat, side eyeing him for any little subtle hint as to what he was thinking. Lucifer snorted, as though it was obvious.

Neither of them talked much about where this was going, or about the future- so when Lucifer volunteered information freely, she took what she could get.

"Well of course I'll be around," he answered, looking a little scandalised at the insinuation that he'd be long gone during her daughter's dreaded teenage years. She wasn't going to totally ignore the fact that her heart skipped a beat when he said that, but she wasn't going to look into it too much right now. "Where else would I be?" he added.

A heavy moment of silence passed before he spoke again and ruined whatever moment he'd created.

"Although granted, at the rate I get shot at around you I might be back in Hell by then anyway."

Chloe's peaceful mood went right out of the window.

"Hey, I don't ask you to step out in front of criminals, do I?" she glared at the side of his face, ignoring the quirk in his lips that told her she'd given him just the reaction he'd wanted in the first place. Screw it. She'd started, so she'd finish. "Oh _hello_ , mister gun wielding maniac! How are you today? Don't mind me, wandering about in your line of sight like a great, stupid, lanky flamingo. I'm invincible don't you know?" she scoffed, crossing her arms with a huff.

A beat.

"That was a dismal attempt to mimic my accent."

"Ugh! You're such an asshole sometimes, did you know that?" she barked and inwardly groaned when his eyes lit up. He loved it when she was angry- God knows why, but he did. Maybe he saw it as a challenge. Or maybe it simply turned him on. Who knew?

"Darling, I love it when you talk dirty to me," he purred, eyes twinkling and she hated, absolutely hated, her lips for finding him funny.

"Shut up Lucifer."

"Oh baby, say it again. You're turning me on," he teased, his accent now a perfect American imitation and damn him! Her cheeks turned pink because he was terribly good at it and if she had to admit it- under threat of death or torture only- it was just the tiniest bit sexy when he spoke like that.

"Hey, it looks like you kind of enjoy the American accent sweetheart," he drawled and she refused to look at him as she fought away her blush. "If I'd known I could make you blush so easily I'd have done this months ago."

Not wanting him to gain the upper hand and needing to divert attention away from the fact that she actually did like it, she went for the obvious insult.

"You sound like Foghorn Leghorn," she muttered petulantly and he laughed.

She couldn't help but look at him and smile when he did. He so rarely genuinely laughed and he always looked so handsome with his eyes shut and his head thrown back- the long column of his throat exposed. It was hardly her fault if she wanted to admire him now and again, was it?

When he finally stopped chuckling, he tongued the inside of his cheek, eyes sparkling with mischief now that she seemed to have lightened up.

"What about Pepé Le Pew?" he asked.

Oh lord, what had she gotten herself into? If he started speaking French there was no way she was going to keep control of her libido.

"Well, since I know zero French, I don't think we'd get along too well. Language barrier and all that," she admitted and she saw his eyes darken a little. She wasn't sure with what though. Lust? Or something else entirely?

"You don't speak any French, at all?" he asked, as though looking for confirmation for something.

She shook her head. "I'm like a brick wall when it comes to other languages. Mom was always trying to teach me for auditions. Nothing really stuck."

He leaned towards her and seeing as they were sort of dating, she didn't feel the need to pull away. All of her need for personal space had pretty much evaporated when he was around lately. She liked having him so close.

"Je t'adore," he mumbled softly, the words rolling off of his tongue like honey and her sex drive revved to life with more power than the shitty car they were currently stuck in. "Je'taime," he continued and their eyes met. Fuck, more than anything she wished she could speak French right now because wow. She swallowed hard.

Lucifer wasn't done though. "Sans toi, je ne suis rien..."

His gaze flickered towards her lips.

Damn it. If she'd been standing instead of sitting right now she would have swooned.

Maybe that look in his eyes was longing because she was pretty sure she was looking at him the same way.

He closed the space between them slowly, kissing her with a lazy sort of tenderness. During the few dates they'd been on in the last couple of weeks, the kisses they'd shared had been wonderful. Passionate. Not quite as filled with emotion as this one though and it sent butterflies racing inside her stomach.

"You're such a dork," she said affectionately when they parted and Lucifer shot her a charming grin.

"And yet you're dating me anyway. What does that say about you I wonder?"

"Maybe I like dorks," she smoothed her thumb across the back of his hand. "And you'll have to translate that French for me later. It was very sexy but I'd like to know what it meant."

He fought off a startled look and gave her a disarming smile instead of a real answer. "Just ramblings darling. Nothing to write home about. Anything sounds sexy in French."

"You'd better have been flattering me and not calling me a tomato or something like that."

His nose nudged hers and he pressed a kiss to the side of her mouth, chuckling.

"Even if I wanted to, I doubt I could find any fault with you darling," he purred, eyes alight with fire and lust and maybe just a little bit of something deeper. If he was trying to warm her up by making her blush then it was working. "Now come here and help warm up your favourite Devil."

He held his arms out to her, wiggling his fingers as if that would make her hurry up.

Chloe shook her head but climbed into his lap all the same- curling into his embrace and suddenly glad that she wouldn't be spending the night in this freezing car alone.

It wasn't until he was finally asleep that she pulled out her phone and Googled just what 'Je'taime' actually meant.

The words shone clear as day from her screen.

Glancing upwards from where she had her head buried against his chest, Chloe smiled serenely.

This was one gigantic dork that she wasn't letting go any time soon.

**Author's Note:**

> More soon my loves.


End file.
